Garling Gauge

Republican New Hampshire Debate Firsts

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Republicans get nasty

It’s time for the first debate firsts after the Iowa caucuses. The playing field has changed, that candidate field has shrunk, and the campaign is growing in intensity. Here we go!

Debate Firsts

• First to be introduced: former Sen. John McCain
• First to say mention a dining room table: moderator Charlie Gibson
• First question: Will run on or against the Bush foreign policy record: Gibson
• First candidate with an odd halo/nimbus behind him (for real): former Gov. Mike Huckabee
• First to dress like a mortician: Huckabee
• First to say we are in a global war: former Sen. Fred Thompson
• First to wear an American flag lapel pin: Thompson (someone had to do it)
• First to say President Bush made the right decision to preemptive war: former mayor Rudy Giuliani
• First to say he supports the ‘Bush doctrine’: Sen. John McCain (moron)
• First debate to have more than one question about our current president: This one!
• First to sport a baby blue shirt: McCain
• First to give a compliment to another candidate: McCain to Giuliani
• First to address another candidate by their first name: former Gov. Mitt Romney to Rep. Ron Paul
• First to wear a tie that looks like a ‘Magic-Eye’ optical illusion: Romney
• First to say that American foreign policy has absolutely nothing to do with attacks on Americans: Giuliani (has their ever been a candidate with a greater amount of idiocy?)
• First to directly argue with Paul about the causes of Islamic terrorism: Romney
• First to ask Romney “which one” position is he taking:Huckabee
• First and only candidate to make sense when discussing foreign policy: Romney
• First to give a time-out signal: Gibson attempting to shut up Giuliani ranting about how wrong Ron Paul is
• First president to ask a question during the debate: Bush (recorded press conference in which the President was asked what type of candidate he would support for president)
• First to say ‘titanic transcendent’: McCain
• First to quote the constitution: McCain
• First spouse shown at the debate: Mrs. Romney (wearing hot pink no less)
• First to invoke Ronald Reagan: Giuliani (isn’t he always the first one to bring up the former President?)
• First to list the major flaws of each Republican candidate: Gibson (Gibson rocks)
• First to sport a trendy houndstooth jacket: Mrs. Huckabee
• First to cough: Thompson
• First to mention we haven’t declared war since World War II: Paul
• First to declare America should follow the Golden Rule: Paul
• First to say “If we can afford a trillion dollar military war, why can’t we afford health care for our citizens?”: Gibson (Gibson rocks, did I mention that?)

[flv]http://garlinggauge.com/videos/repdebate.flv[/flv]
Debate snippet 

• First to disagree with a health care expert: Giuliani
• First to say American has a war-mongering foreign policy: Paul
• First to give the thumbs-up: Paul
• First candidate to laugh: Romney
• First candidate to rock back and forth in his chair: Paul
• First to say we have a ‘disease care system’: Huckabee
• First to say a tissue costs $1000 at a hospital: Huckabee
• First to make a silly, muggy face: McCain
• First to say illegal immigrants are God’s children: McCain
• First to utterly avoid answering a question: Giuliani on immigration
• First to bring up Joe Lieberman: McCain speaking of his future running mate
• First debate split screen: McCain & Romney arguing about McCain’s immigration plan
• First candidate to have a zoom-in shot: Romney
• First candidate to get a laugh from the audience: Giuliani
• First to repeat himself three times: Thompson
• First to say throwing children out on the street is inhumane: Giuliani (aw, shucks)
• First to mention how long it took to build the Empire State Building: Huckabee
• First to say Americans should vote for himself over Barack Obama because Americans want change: Romney (wtf?)
• First to say Romney certain is the candidate of “change”: McCain
• First to use the word transcendent twice: McCain
• First to say he respects Sen. Barack Obama: McCain
• First to have trouble attacking Obama: Romney
• Second to have trouble attacking Obama: McCain
• Third to have trouble attacking Obama: Giuliani
• First to say America is looking for ‘vertical leadership’: Huckabee
• First to say he and Obama have similarities: Paul
• First to joke that he and Obama both get young supporters because they are of similar age: Paul
• First person to raise his hand: Paul
• First mention of the environment: McCain
• First to wear not one, but TWO microphones: co-moderator Scott Spralding
• First to say we can throw rocks at each other: Thompson
• First to say, in his best “Dune” voice, “The oil (spice) must flow.”: Thompson
• And the winner? Um… I don’t think so.

More Debate Firsts here.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22516829/

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